It’s as Ann as the nose on Plain’s face.
It’s as Ann as the nose on Plain’s face.
the US is unreal like girls cant wear shorts to school, you can literally lose your job for being gay, and unarmed black children are brutally murdered on the regular but old white ppl r still like “what a beautiful country. i can freely carry a gun for no reason and some of our mountains look like presidents. god bless”
If someone were to die at the age of 63 after a lifelong battle with MS or Sickle Cell, we’d all say they were a “fighter” or an “inspiration.” But when someone dies after a lifelong battle with severe mental illness and drug addiction, we say it was a tragedy and tell everyone “don’t be like him, please seek help.” That’s bullshit. Robin Williams sought help his entire life. He saw a psychiatrist. He quit drinking. He went to rehab. He did this for decades. That’s HOW he made it to 63. For some people, 63 is a fucking miracle. I know several people who didn’t make it past 23 and I’d do anything to have 40 more years with them.
Oh boy. Yes, of course. Most things that typically have to do with womanhood are rife with guilt. I’m sure that’s not surprising to you. People feel guilty for not having babies, people feel guilty for having babies. People feel guilty for giving birth without pain medications and for using pain medication, for having a vaginal birth and for having a cesarean birth. People feel guilty for breastfeeding and for bottlefeeding. Basically, parenthood is all about guilt. Again, I’m sure that’s not surprising to you.
But I’ll tell you something - some of the most beautiful, meaningful, amazing births that I’ve seen have been with the use of an epidural. I had one patient, an older woman, who probably had a history of sexual abuse (though she never told me so) who had intense pain with every single exam. The contractions were hard and she was committed to a natural birth, but she dilated to 7 cms and then stopped. She wanted a natural labor so badly that we tried everything - we got her in the tub, in the shower, on all fours, outside and walking… 2 days went by. At this point, we were thinking she needed to have a cesarean section, but even the calm, careful talking that we were doing would send her into a fit of tears. Finally we talked her into trying an epidural, just to get some rest and try again, so that we would feel like we had tried everything before she ended up with a cesarean. I felt terrible about it because I knew how committed she was, but I knew that if things didn’t change, her baby would soon become distressed. There’s only so much of labor that either mom or baby can take.
We called in the anesthesiologist and she cried as the epidural was placed, but within 20 minutes she was fast asleep. Two hours later she woke up suddenly and looked at me, her eyes wide. ”I think my baby is coming!” She told me, her voice quiet but direct. I called everyone into the room, did an exam, and not only was she fully dilated, but her baby was practically crowning. We all cheered. The woman herself was so happy that she laughed, and her laughing brought the baby down further. We quickly put our sterile gowns and gloves on, and I held my hands to her perineum, asking her to keep laughing. She kept laughing and her husband started making jokes and before we knew it we had a baby born to laughter and smiles and the early morning sunlight of day 3 of labor.
When we talked about it with her the next day, she told me that she had been so scared of the pain and the possibility of ending up with a cesarean that it felt like she was paralyzed. I’m certain that something in her current life, her relationship with her husband or her history, perhaps a history of trauma, was significant in slowing down her labor so drastically. I’m so glad that we were able to give her the relaxation and support that she needed in that moment, to let her pelvic muscles rest and her mind turn off even just for an hour or two. That was all she needed to have exactly the birth that she had desired.
It really goes in every direction. My only goal as a midwife is to help guide my patients to the birth that they desire, not to force them to have a natural birth or force them to have the birth that I think they should have. I’ll do anything and everything I can think of to protect their desires, and when that doesn’t work, I’ll help them figure out what the next best thing is. I know that’s how most midwives operate, so I think if you do decide to have a baby, you should visit with a midwife and really talk everything out. Explain exactly what you’re afraid of and exactly what you want, and your midwife will know how to help you get there.
advantages to wearing oversized sweaters:
- instant cute outfit with minimal effort
- it enhances the coziness when u drink hot beverages
- sweater paws are guaranteed to make u feel 43% more adorable
- u can unbutton ur jeans and no one will know
disadvantages to wearing oversized sweaters:
Guys think they’re totally not cute lol
the day i dress for a man is the day they dress me in my coffin to see jesus
even aliens have better representation in media than bisexual people